Things just got real. Until now, I’d been wondering if Puberty 2.0 would ever actually kick in. I mean, I’ve been on estrogen for eight months and the affects have been minimal. Until now.
I was told by my gender clinic psychologist that things would start to happen when I began taking testosterone blockers. And boy (girl) was she right.
I’ve now been on estrogen for eight months and T-blockers for two months. For the first six months of this process, pretty much nothing happened. Maybe a slight change in smell (sweeter), maybe slightly softer skin, maybe a few tingles here and there. Maybe.
Then T-blockers – and boom! The first thing I noticed was a side effect – really painful aches and pains in my arms. These would come and go – and they still do. Sometimes, there’s no pain at all, other times it huuuurts!
Things began to change “down there”, too. I won’t go into too much detail – one or two people I know read this blog – but let’s just say that libedo has nosedived and, if I am so inclined, it takes a little longer to stoke the fires. But that’s OK – I was expecting that.
But boobs! I had been getting little tingles, little itches, occasional stabbing pains behind both nipples even before starting T-blockers. After starting blockers, the tingleometer was turned up a few notches. And, as of yesterday, well, ow, ow, ow!
Absolutely nothing’s happened yet with my left nipple (that’s my left, not your left, unless you’re behind me, like a stalker) but the right one is very definitely tender right behind the nipple. No bud yet – no pea, no blueberry, no little disc – but it’s in the post.
I’ve read up, and apparently it’s normal for one side to kick in before the other. So that’s nice.
I hated my male puberty – it was shit. I didn’t want any of its effects. Added to that, all my female friends were getting all the effects I wanted. Double whammy of woe. Part of me wishes I’d transitioned back then – but they were “different times” and at least I’m getting there now. Puberty at age 45. Whatever next?!
Before starting this journey, I was also worried that taking massive doses of phytoestrogens in the past might have f*cked up my estrogen receptors and that HRT simply wouldn’t work for me.
But it is. I feel so excited and nervous all at the same time. A year from now, I’m going to be a different person, at least on the outside.
In other news, I’ve been pretty poorly the past couple of weeks with a virus. That’s why I’ve not written up how Christmas went, but I shall do soon. It went marvellously, by the way, thanks for asking – about a billion light years better than the one 12 months earlier.
Moves are afoot on the job front, too, but more on that later as I don’t want to jinx it.
Right, that’s all for now. I’m going to go and find a hot water bottle.
Andie xxx
Jane says
Just found your blog. So pleased for you to be getting it on
Carina Thompson says
Omg so bloody proud of you
Christ you look fantastic
Love love following your story x x
Andie Pas de Deux says
Awww, thanks so much, Carina! xxx
Lauren says
I like your blog keep strong love that motto don’t dream it be it 🙂
Lauren
Andie Pas de Deux says
Shamelessly stolen from Rocky Horror, Lauren! xxx
Clarissa Cross says
Thank You for posting this, it was great reading about your experience.Quite interesting that only your left nipple is unaffected.
Im a doctor and 12 years ago I went on HRT, by my own prescription, for about 6 months and got a nice size A left breast but almost nothing happened to my right side. So now I use some more padding on my right side when wearing a bra. Unfortunately I had to stop HRT because I was married then and she did not now anything about myHRT though she knew I was crosdressing, which she liked. I got emotional bursts like suddenly crying and sweating almost like climacteria, and then I stopped HRT. Today I really can’t do it again because my own doctor would know due to digitalized prescriptions.
Im still considering a transition with HRT but no surgery but haven’t the guts to do it yet